The Jesus Rehab


A record about mind reading lizards, chubby 10 year olds, and what its like to grow up in a world where no one is as they seem. 


“They are original and have the attitude!” —Jack Rabid, The Big Takeover

“Drummer Dominic Cortese’s stripping, sweating, flailing, and general acrobatics mix with his brother Jared’s guitar work to feel just as much like a major-key Led Zeppelin or groovier Japandroids.” —SONGLYRICS

“The Jesus Rehab look at home playing in front of a packed crowd determined to dance, or alone in the dark corner of a whisky-dive bar with a busted PA. And in either situation, The Jesus Rehab will sing and stomp until there’s nothing left but two brothers having a good time as Seattle’s most exclusive club.” —Pop’stache


From The Monarch Review:

‘Mind Readers’ is the first single off The Jesus Rehab’s new album, ‘The Zoo At Night,’ with a record release show slated for Feb. 1st  2014 at the Sunset Tavern. The shot begins with a pan onto Julia Massey (local musician and TJR singer-songwriter Jared Cortese’s wife), the television glowing blue upon her face, her eye twitching. Some people turn to lizards, a man on the TV reports. A-Wah-Huh?!?! Then: Rock Music. In the song, we’re informed of an idea: everyone is a slave to the Lizard King. What this means can only be deciphered by watching the new creation from TJR, which happens to include a boxing match with a huge orange glove, copious amounts of confetti and so many of the wonderful faces of the Seattle creative community.”

From Live Eye Tv:

Live Eye Tv has teamed up with the Seattle duo The Jesus Rehab to make a new music video for their anthemic track “Mind Readers“! The song finds brothers Jaredand Dominic Cortese manhandling this pop gem into a gritty and raucous garage burner about schziophrenic prophets and paranormal Lizard Kings. Made on a particularly soggy Saturday this Fall, the video brought together the band’s creative and highly motivated team of friends with our crack video crew, for a basement production about a parallel reality where ‘mind altering lizards secretly rule using the power of rock to seduce their unsuspecting prey.’ Heck, the Rehab bunch even cooked up a lunch spread that day with slow cooked pork and vegan options! Now, that’s how you get it done. Look for “Mind Readers” to come out on the band’s upcoming February 1st release ‘The Zoo At Night,’ and if planning months in advance is your thing, The Jesus Rehab informs us they will play a record release show that night in Seattle at The Sunset Tavern, with other notable locals Hounds Of The Wild Hunt, and Tangerine.”


Jared of The Jesus Rehab on the video for “Mind Readers”:

“We shot the video with Live Eye Tv, which is a music blog that covers independent and experimental music here in Seattle.  They are extremely humble guys, so they don’t really hype themselves very much, but I know they recently worked with The Cave Singers on a video.  Everyone involved works in film for large companies or as free lancers, and Live Eye Tv is a labor of love for them. We ended up working with them because my brother Dom makes amazing coffee and the director, Mike Johnson, is one of his regulars at his shop.  We actually meet a lot of people we collaborate with that way. It’s our secret weapon.

 The shoot was laughs all around!  The director Mike Johnson and his awesome crew were extremely laid back but professional, and Julia Massey got to flex her film muscles as assistant director, which she happens to be really talented at. I think wearing lizard eyes was definitely a highlight for me. Dom, Robb Benson, and I couldn’t get enough of ourselves. ha ha.  I think there are like ten pictures of just our eyes!  I think watching Geoff Gibbs and Charlie Cate geek out on their choreography all weekend was definitely a highlight as well.  Man those guys really love wrestling. There is also a section during the interlude after the first chorus where Dom, Darla Barry Benson, Michael Raley, and myself are all dancing around and being crazy. That was so fun because it was completely off the cuff.  We were just supposed to dance around while that little section played and then before we knew it, we just kept going and it kept getting wilder and wilder.  I actually ended up naked standing on my bass amp by the end of the song, but we decided to not use that footage.”

Band-album BIO and news about the BIG ASS BOOMBOX Festival coming up January 4th at The Crocodile

Dominic Cortese – Vox, Percussion
Jared Cortese – Lead Vox, Guitar, Piano


The Jesus Rehab loves Seattle. Deep, devoted, semi-popular music fans they moved here from the Midwest to rock and enjoy the creative live music underground.

The Jesus Rehab’s new full-length “The Zoo At Night” is full of sweet, muscular garage pop. The Seattle band, who In April of 2012 put out their first record as a duo, have since played a ton of excellent shows, benefits, and tours. Now they have put together a new release that feels like a walk across a Spanish desert naked with an unholy mission to make joyful, jacked up noise to send straight up to the heavens.

Streamlined recently to a two-piece, brothers Jared and Dominic consciously construct songs that are gritty, raw, and honest. The brothers current goal is to jump into a sea of screaming maniacs, and they continue to make records that inspire madness in their audience, intending to make this dream come true.

‘The Zoo At Night’ is that album. Their live shows have always been athletic-art damage events as the two brothers feed off of each others energy dancing and singing with their fans. That is where you will find The Jesus Rehab “singing and stomping until there’s nothing left but two brothers having a good time as Seattle’s most exclusive club” (

“I honestly feel like it’s the best title we’ve ever come up with,” Jared says about the name of the new full-length. “Figuring out what our albums are about is always a fun game for me. I can’t remember who came up with the name, but I felt like the lyrical content of the album is very much about my childhood and the music is dark yet playful.  Somehow, thinking of the zoo at night really makes me feel the same way that thinking about my childhood does.  Like you’re this being, as close to your nature as you will ever be, but everyday your being taught to suppress certain parts of yourself for the safety and survival of yourself and your environment.  We eventually become this safe member of society, where all of our uncivilized characteristics are suppressed and caged up, like the animals in a zoo. So Dom and I imagine that unlocking these suppressed parts, and being our true selves, is similar to what happens at the zoo when everyone leaves.  All the animals leave their cages and hang out.  None of that predator/prey stuff, that’s all a bunch of hollywood made up crap.”

‘The Zoo At Night’ was produced and engineered by David Miner, who is a Seattle sound expert that originally worked out of London Bridge Studios and also works out of his own studio.  His studio is called Chartreuse Muffin Studio, “and that is where we tracked and mixed ‘The Zoo At Night.’  We also worked with David on our previous release ‘Drunken Hillbilly Fight Bar’ so we have known him for a few years now.”

Big Freak Media is proud to be the publicist for The Jesus Rehab.
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